Let Me Go
by twilighter890
Summary: '"I'm tired, Hotch. I'm so tired. I don't want to do this anymore." Her voice was shaky, she was trying to hold back the tears.' This is my version of JJ leaving. JJ/Hotch friendship.


**Ok, so I am still very depressed that JJ is getting cut from the show. With that being said, I am hoping for a scene like this, or better, to give her a great exit.**

* * *

"Your leaving." Hotch stated. In response JJ jumped, almost dropping the picture she was holding of her and the team.

"Hotch, you scared me." She tried to smile, but it came out more of a grimace.

"Your leaving." He stated again, hating the taste of it on his tongue.

"Yeah. I am." She put down the stuff she was putting into a big brown box. She had been bracing herself for this conversation since she dropped her official resignation in at Strauss's desk this morning.

"Were you going to tell me? Or just leave?" He asked emotionlessly. The façade was not at it's strongest because JJ could see the hurt in his eyes.

"Of course I was going to tell you. How could you think that I wouldn't?" She replied.

"Why?" He dropped the stony look and just became the man whose friend was leaving him unexpectedly.

JJ turned around for a brief moment. She looked at a file open on her desk. "I'm tired, Hotch. I'm so tired. I don't want to do this anymore." Her voice was shaky, she was trying to hold back the tears. JJ turned back around to him, "I don't want to see what serial killers do to people anymore. I don't want the nightmares of lifeless eyes staring at me. I don't want to look at my son, and see the dozens of murdered children. I just can't do this anymore."

"Jaje, why didn't you come to me?" He sighed and sat down in one of her chairs, rubbing his face frustrated. "I could have helped you with this. We could have talked and you wouldn't have to leave-"

"Last night was Henry's birthday." She started to cry, "And I missed it, because we were on a case!"

The tears flowed down her cheek. "I don't want to be that person! I don't want to be the mom who forgets her kid's birthday!"

Hotch had nothing to say to that. He closed his eyes and leaned back. He and JJ had always had a good relationship, a good friendship. And he knew that lately, she hadn't been dealing to well with all of the stress of the job. He knew that this is what she needed, but he still felt like he needed her. And he didn't want her to leave.

"We've been together for almost 10 years, JJ. You've been with me the longest out of everyone on the team. I can't lose you." He almost begged.

"Please Hotch." The tears were still running down her cheeks, but she kept her voice steady. "Please let me have this. I need this. I've been there for you through so much. When we gained, then lost Elle. And lost Gideon. And gained Prentiss and Rossi. And… Hailey. But this time… this I need you to be there for me. I need you to let me go. I know that if you ask me to stay… I would. So please Hotch… let me have my life back."

The urge to ask her to stay was overwhelming. It would be so easy to ask her, and have everything go back to how it was. How it was when she first was designated to liaison for him. How it was when they had the easy partnership that they had before they let their lives get away from them.

He knew JJ since she was fresh out of college. He couldn't imagine his job without her. But with all of that said… this was JJ. His friend was begging him for him to let her go and he was being selfish. This job was consuming her. And he couldn't deprive Henry from his mother, or his mother from him. He couldn't watch her turn into Elle.

He felt tears burn the back of his eyes. But he wouldn't let them show. Not ever. So he carefully got up and stood right in front of her. He kneeled down until he was eye to eye with her.

"If you ever need anything. You know I 'm here. I don't want you to leave, JJ. But I don't want you to stay. I want you to be the best mother/girlfriend/and whatever job position you get."

She smiled and then sobbed. She wrapped her arms around him and cried into his suit. He carefully returned the embrace and tiled his head up.

"Thank you Hotch. Thank you."

Hotch nodded and smiled into her hair. He thought back over the last couple of months and realized that JJ wasn't the only one feeling the effects of what this job could do to you.

He suspected that he was right behind her on wanting his life back.

* * *

**I hope you like it!**


End file.
